I'm not high-maintenance, I'm just demanding - the Moorish Idol

People love aquariums. People love putting fish and things in aquariums. But sometimes those choices are kind of poor. A salt water tank tends to be one of those things that many view as a blank canvas, and owners can't wait to start dumping swimming things into them. However, a lot like carefully considering who you want to go to senior prom with, picking and choosing the right salt water fish may save you time, energy, money, sanity, and happiness.

Few fish in the animal kingdom are as beautiful as the Moorish Idol. With its unique body structure and seductive name, there aren't many moor (ha ha...puns) fish that top this choice. Their bodies are compact and angular. When viewed from the side they look wonderfully-shaped, ridiculously long dorsal fins decorate the top of the body while its face tapers quickly down to an adorable "snout". When viewed from the front they virtually disappear given their disc-like shaping.

A common dweller of warm tropical waters, the Idols enjoy spending their time in shallow reefs, eating, swimming, and avoiding recapture for the colder, less enjoyable North American markets. Idols have been observed as life-maters, but generally speaking, are not strong schoolers (that is, they don't like socializing all that much).

Idols love their space. They love to eat. And when you take away both, well, they're likely to take up famine protests, creating that other problem: death. Despite its incredible popularity in tanks, Idols do not survive well in captivity. Not only do they need a lot of room, but they become aggressive if needs are not met. As if salt water tanks aren't hard enough to take care of, its inhabitants generally require far more care than fresh water. The pH balance has to be just right and the available diet has to be just so in order for the fish to be happy and healthy.

This was really just a long-winded way of saying maybe we could admire these beautiful fish without all that death and stuff. You know, by letting it live in its native habitat. Just an idea.

True Story II: the redfish

To be truthful, there's more than one kind of "redfish". Redfish is the generic term for the large family of snappers (which confusingly the bluefish also belongs).

The snapper...that mean-looking bugger whose bite is worse than its, uh, stare. Its typical appearance makes it the default neighborhood bully. Generally speaking, snappers have large heads that taper down as the body lengthens, punctuated by spiny fins and the common bifurcated fish tail. Snappers usually don't win beauty contests. Its teeth might be a contributing factor.

If the snapper were a bar patron or a legal professional it would most likely be voted "literal bottom feeder." That should be enough to deter you from ordering it the next time you go out.

True story: the bluefish

Say this ten times fast: pomatomus. That's the genus name of the bluefish. This fella is found in many parts of the world, and as often as he's caught he has just as many names. When he's in Australia he's known as a "tailor", "shad" on the east coast of South Africa and "elf" on the west coast. Downtown he's "blue", midtown he's "chopper", and in Queens "anchoa".

So what is he and why is he so etymologically cute? Well, we're not exactly sure why he has so many names other than he gets around.

When you think of the noun "fish", the bluefish is what generally comes to mind. Long enough body, spiny dorsal fins, and that shiny bluish-silver hue. Uniquely not cuddly about the bluefish is its razor sharp teeth. It is prolific in its existence but also very delicately cyclical. Many a fishing season can go by without a bluefish capture, conversely that's all you may get the following year.

Since its a marine fish, not much is known about its breeding/spawning behavior. In addition, how creepy is this, the bluefish is so aggressive its one of the few recorded species of fish to kill for fun. For fun! Sure, there are many species of carnivorous, mean fish. But not many are known to murder other fish. If they keep it up, they'll drive fisherman out of business.

But we digress. The bluefish is a prized game fish, not necessarily because of its flesh. It tends to be quite theatrical when being caught, voraciously fighting, catapulting itself out of the water, and continuing its struggle once captured and on board. Things get crazier when there's a feeding frenzy involved, they will go after anything that remotely resembles other small shiny fish (like coins).

Did we mention it's not a very good eat? The flesh is dense, oily, and...fishy. If it's not eaten immediately decomposition will take care of your catch for you. We just think it might be better if you left those unedible thugs of the ocean alone.

Score one for sea otters!

How cute is that, they're holding hands.  Finally, a chance for a little R&R.

For the love of Tofu

We admit it.  Tofu is not the sexiest of foods.  While it has tons and tons of admirable qualities, most people cannot get past its weird pasty, blocky, cold appearance.  But what it lacks in looks it makes up for with heart.

The primary county fair ribbon it holds is that it's a universal meat substitute.  Tofu is packed with protein but with a fraction of the saturated fat found in most meats.  The soy protein has been clinically proven to lower the bad (LDL) cholesterol (but does not increase your HDL). Tofu touts so much protein that in one (1) serving (about half a cup) it contains just over 10 grams of the good stuff.  Adults should consume approximately 45-55 grams a day. That one serving knocks out nearly a quarter of the recommended intake. 

Tofu is also typically lower in calories, allowing you to eat a few more forkfuls of stir fry without feeling as much guilt.  How much lower you ask?  A 1/2 cup of tofu (4 oz) compared to 4 oz of ground beef trounces the red stuff.  Tofu measures in about 100 calories for that serving size, whereas beef brings in over 330.

Calcium is also provided for in this alien form.  One serving can give you about 22% of your recommended intake (depending on the type).  The type, like beef, can come in a few different ways.  There's firm, extra-firm, extra-soft, silken, and low-calorie.  

But don't let its modest appearance fool you.  Its structure is very spongy, allowing it be a master of disguise, absorbing marinades, sauces, and flavorings extra well.  It will take in a ton of flavoring so you can pretend you're enjoying something other than a white chunk of plant.

So why are we hocking the tofu?  The fish would like a break, and to give a friendly service announcement that vegetarians don't eat meat.  Remember when veggie burgers became mainstream and kind of cool?  Why can't veggie fish cakes?  And sure, most people would argue that the facsimile is nowhere near the real thing.  But we think that's more to the point.  We are living in a generation where fish species are dying-gone-forever and that's all we'll be forced to think about, substitutions.

Scientists trawl with nets for interesting stuff

And manage to kill a giant squid in the process.  Sure, we could look at it as neither party intentionally planned for the animal's demise, but the jellyfish-pokers on board should've been somewhat aware that trawling is harmful.

In a recent article about the squid's untimely death it was revealed that the expedition was being conducted for a purpose that seems relatively ironic: studying the available supply of food for whales by trawling.  That's a bit heavy-handed don't you think?  That's like using a blowtorch to light some birthday candles.

No one in the academic or animal preserve community would sponsor such a hazardous-posing study, that's just crazy talk!  What's that?  Oh, the fine folks at NOAA footed the bill.  Hm.  Awkward.

Hoki-pocus!

As a follow up to our previous post, we'd like to present further evidence of how we're going to be eating things that are beyond ugly in the very near future.

Meet the hoki, a common cod-like family member:

Never heard of it?  Not surprising, afterall how many times do you ask McDonald's what's in its Filet-O-Fish?  

(ewww)

The hoki is commonly found off the coast of New Zealand but have been located in both the Atlantic and Pacific oceans.  It's an uninspiring-looking fish.  Its large eyes, which makes it look constantly surprised, dull silvery-scaled body which ends into a whip-tail, and protruding jaw doesn't exactly make it a prime choice for aquariums.

So what makes the hoki the main attraction of the fast-food culinary world?  Well, sadly because its cousins have been trawled to near-collapse.  Its veneer hides the desirable flesh beneath.  Its flesh is dense and milky white, it tends to be flaky and mildly sweet.  It was also discovered as a substitute source to many other local species.

There are plethora of problems related to the trawling of this fish.  Where shall we start.  Let's start a list, we like lists.

1. It's not sustainable, not at the rate we're going.  Yes, we really like it when fisheries take responsibility and aim to keep fish stocks at healthy levels.  But, discovering a specie that seems so large, especially during spawning seasons, that we think we we can dip our big trawlers in every year without making a dent is ludicrous.  When the hoki was discovered as an acceptable substitute, New Zealand set trawling quotas surprisingly high.  Only recently has it slashed those numbers.
2. Have you ever been on a speed dating session?  You know how you mark down the people you really, really like, then the people you like, then the people if you absolutely had to go out with last?  Well the hoki would be the absolute last choice.  But because the more desirable fish species like the red snapper and orange roughy have been traumatically damaged we're looking at the butter-face of fishes.  When will we stop the madness.
3. Two words for the future: blob fish.
   

What is a good substitute to eating this fish or other kinds?  Well we're big fans of salads.

The future of sushi

This is it, folks.  You're looking at the tuna-substitute of the near future.  And we're not kidding, this is an actual living entity in the ocean, and if we're not careful, it will be creatively hidden in menus as "white fish surprise".

We happen to like it, not only because it was Evolution's aborted extra credit assignment but also because truth is stranger than fiction.  This is the blobfish.  It doesn't do much.  As evidenced by the photo, it doesn't possess much of a body structure.  It has maybe two or three muscles, therefore it can't really propel itself through the water.  It just kind of...hovers.  As it floats right above the ocean floor it waits for nonsense food to float by.  It eats things we'd never consider fish food.  But then again...our future might look eerily similar at the rate we're going.  

A few thoughts about donating

Nonprofits don't particularly enjoy the fact that they don't raise revenue.  This means they have to aggressively campaign for donations.  Sometimes it feels like begging.  This has never been more true than now.  Our economic climate has left the majority of us with very little disposable income.  And because of this donations to charities have suffered a huge setback. The lack of fundraising has placed tremendous pressure on charities' balance sheets and skyrocketed blood pressures.

Even in good times charities continually struggle to remain well-capitalized, well enough to continue very important operations.  Oftentimes we opt out of supporting because we are suspicious of the mission or the use of our funds.  That's what organizations like Charity Navigator are for.  The site, as well as a few others, vet the nonprofits/NGOs for you so you can make a better investment choice. If fish were able to, they'd go out and conserve their species and preserve their environments.  But since they can't, it leaves us to be the responsible ones.

We'd like to put in our $0.02 and ask that you consider making a donation once a year.  We're big fans of organizations like Sea Shepherd, Surfrider, and Oceana. Even if it's just your loose change it'll result in a quieter pocket, a tax deduction, and a happier heart.

Did you know I can go to Japan...and back?

An ode to: the Salmon.

This species of fish is just bursting with "did you knows".  Like what?  Glad you asked!

• Salmon are diadromous, which means they travel between fresh and salt water, and are anadromous which means they live primarily in salt water but breed in fresh.  The distinction isn't all that important, other than it's cool it does both.
• Because the species is primarily a salt-dependent one, they rarely if ever survive in fresh water.  So that sad ending of the salmon dying after breeding is true.  
• Salmon have extraordinary memories.  In fact, certain generations of salmon have been tracked and traced to reveal they return to the same spot in which they've been spawned.
• Salmon are very sensitive to its environment, including water temperature differences, gravitational pulls, and current changes.  
• Salmon appears in a variety of species, including Atlantic, Pacific (chinook, pink, and sockeye), and of course Steelhead...or "true" salmon.  Most folks know it as "rainbow trout".  Anyway you call it, it's a beautiful and endearing fish.

Because salmon is considered a popular "oily" fish, it's unfortunately up there with its cousin the tuna on menus of every restaurant variety.  To counter the rapidly increasing consumption, like its cousin, salmon is being farmed with mediocre results.  What exactly are the problems to aquaculture?  Glad you asked!

• Disease, people, disease.  Fish that are caged farmed are high susceptible to illnesses and parasites than their natural, wild counterparts.  And once the farmed product is released into the wild, well...there goes the neighborhood.  Rates of infection are incredibly high for wild stocks, which only adds to the depletion of its stock.  Not to mention it's a counterproductive element to stock sustainability.
• "Wild" cage farming not in highly controlled fish farms skirt/cheat certain QC requirements, this only aggravates the disease issue.  Wild farming only regulates the water with appropriate amount of oxygen for the increasing fish stock, and not with water treatments that regulated fish farms are required to do.
• The main issue with farming, even with the most highly regulated and expertly driven, is that rapid, dense populations throw off the balance of its environment.  Pathogen control is variable, problematic at best and rampant at worst.  Pollutants (read: fish poop) create an ideal breeding ground for parasites, bacteria, worms, and fungi.

We don't really advocate consumption of fish because we'd consider that enabling bad habits.  But, if you are to eat, please consider the environment.  Consuming the real, wild, natural salmon to its farm-raised shadow is a slightly better choice, but really we'd like you to choose the chicken if possible.

Your Friendly Guide of What Not to Eat

Ok, ok...it's more of a "if-you-have-to-eat-fish-keep-this-in-mind" type of guide.  This wonderfully compact, succinct, and colorful memo will help you make better decisions about our fine-finned friends.  

And we're going to insert an interjection/wish list/argument here.  We would love it if the world's industrialized countries came together and sensibly voted to preserve 30% of the world's oceans.  This would allow struggling stocks of marine life to rebound as well as provide a sort of Camp David for the suffering species.  And as much as it seems like a sensible request (considering the earth is 2/3 water) this will not happen any time soon.  In fact, less than 1% of the world's waters are protected into reserves.  That is shameful.  We give a lot of attention to global warming and how to counter the toxins in the ozone.  Much of the poison is created via the use of fossil fuels.  And a lot of fuel is used for mammoth whaling fleets and commercial fishing vessels.  

Let's be sensible.  If you were going to buy a house in a neighborhood that has rampant crime you wouldn't say "well, if I fix up this home the problem will go away".  The focus should be multi-faceted.  And in this example, it can be true that if an effort becomes self-sustained and community supported the problem/issue can be minimized or eradicated all together.  But it requires a lot of focused work and rigorous problem solving.

What do we propose?  Obviously the ocean reserves (this also protects coral reefs that are on the knife's edge of destruction), actually monitor and regulate international fishing policies in the meantime (and we mean regulate, none of this "we believe you 'cuz you're on a boat" nonsense), intensify some policies and close some ridiculous loopholes (we're looking at you, Japan), and of course lastly...do not feed the monster.  Our appetite is increasing exponentially, this doesn't mean we haven't to give in to it.  The bottom line is always important (especially for businesses), but that doesn't mean we have to ring up disaster at the checkout to achieve it.  Check out places like Responsible Travel, a company that is forward-thinking in creating enjoyable vacations that are eco-friendly. In a time when we are suffering global economic ruins, this is when we should be looking forward and redefining how we do business for ourselves in connection with our world. 

Squids, squids, squids!

We here at this blog love our squids. We love the fact that they look squishy, are squishy, and can sometimes freak out the best of us.  And humans react to encounters with uncommon species in a way that puts our evolutionary logic to shame.  Squids are our friends, no matter what.

So what's the hub-bub about?  Check out the inflated news about the Humboldt Squid, or as they're known in Mexico...el Squidos, taco-tossers.  Just kidding, we're pretty sure they're not into tacos.  But seriously, they tend to hang around warmer waters, so they typically call Mexico home.

These muscular and aggressive members of the cephalopod class (if you wanna get nerdy, family Ommastrephidae) are typically found in deep waters as cephalopods are wont to do.  There are incredible things about Humboldt squids.  Their lifespans are usually very short (on average one year), they grow rapidly during the little time they have (a five-footer is typical), and creepily enough because they are voracious hunters they have been documented to cannibalize their own.  They form shoals that exceed 1,000 or more squids at any one time.  That might account for the cannibalism ("man I'm hungry, what's around here?  another squid!").  But aside from that, they're your normal Giant Squid variety.

The phenomenon of the squids migrating to CA is another interesting sign of the dramatic environmental changes we are creating in the world.  You think we have it rough with hotter summers and warmer winters it's nothing compared to the rest of the animal kingdom that do not have self-contained boxes of comfort.  The squids are following weather and food patterns.  This should not be surprising.  We have seen it in thousands of species, most notably polar bears and tunas.  Breeds are dying off because food sources are becoming scarce and subsequently damages or breaks links in the food chain.

Californians are freaked yes, sure, but this surprise appearance of Humboldts will be short-lived.  They will either fall back into their normal pattern and return to deeper waters or they will be the object of intense hatred-fueled hunting off the coasts.  We can only hope it's the former.

So remember, should you meet the Humboldt whilst you vacation anywhere exotic (or CA), don't egg it on (you will most likely lose) and don't poke at it if it washes ashore.

Would you like an extra helping of "slap in the head" to go with that?

Today's topic of discussion was a tough decision. There was the guilt factor, in which chiding was involved with this post.  Then there was the happy factor, the wanting to discuss the warm-and-fuzzies we get when we see the super cuddly whale shark.

So, instead of negotiating we're going to do both. Would you like an appetizer of happiness first or the scalding entree of shame?  

Ok, ok...best to let the meal cool off a bit first.  

Ah, the whale shark.  As far as names go, this one is humorously to the point.  It is indeed a filter feeding shark that is the largest of all living fishes.  While its cousin Jaws is terrorizing the coast of north Jersey (as it should...it is Jersey, afterall) the whale shark is ever so slowly cruising through the warm seas in search of microbes.

The whale shark is a lot like a vintage cadillac in terms of its place in marine biology.  Its heritage can be traced back before even the Permian!  That's old.  We're talking tens of millions of years ago.  And the beauty of this species is that unlike bears which look cute and gentle, these animals are just that...cute and gentle.  They are often used to educate the general public about shark behavior.  While the whale shark is most definitely one of the nicest you can find, that lesson is probably a bit lopsided because of it.  You won't find a lot of volunteers creating a feeding frenzy with great whites just to show how they're not man-eaters.

As a filter feeder the whale shark relies primarily on plankton, krill, and occasionally "meatier" items like jellyfish.  The way it feeds is similar to the lion fish, it uses its powerful suction to swallow tons of water and trap the tiny meals inside.  It then expels the water out through its gills leaving the food to safely travel down the way of Jonah and the...you get the point.

These are beautiful animals.  A member of one of the best examples of evolutionary design, but containing the pageant looks of the regal whale family.  They find humans curious, and reports have spread (though most likely anecdotal) about the sharks coming up to divers and swimmers for "pettings" near the suface of the water.  

Wasn't that nice?

Now how horrible is this??  

If you find this appetizing in any way, we urge you to quit reading this blog and to run out and kick a dog, shoot some birds out of the trees, burn down a rain forest, and then pour bleach into the nearest tributary that leads to the ocean.

We are standing on the knife's edge of man's harmony or complete destruction of nature.  Yes, we are in dire straights with our domestic economy, and yes the global bubble has popped in a fantastic nature that would've made Adam Smith have a heart attack, but this does not excuse us from our responsibility to make amends for our mistakes.

Killing whales, or sharks, or whale sharks, should not stand.  We shouldn't allow the mass commercial fishing of everything in the water to be a biological version of TARP.  If seeing that bloody photo above doesn't stir any kind of sadness, guilt, or pain...then your name is John Thain and you've redecorated your home in whale shark curtains and comb your hair with a  shark denticle comb.

Cookie Cutters! And not in a good way.

Today's lesson in the creepy crawly nastiness that the ocean sometimes produces is yet another hilarious example of poor-naming-obviousness.  

Meet the cookie cutter shark.  When you look at them straight on, they look even deceptively happy, smiling almost.  But no, they are mean little suckers.  Literally.  They will suction themselves onto the unfortunate prey, and with their circular jaws, cut out a circular chunk of flesh from the poor host animal.

To make things worse...they're tiny little buggers!  So they will scar its victims, not necessarily kill.  But, they're kind of wimps, are ugly...and not that smart.  The marks of the cookie cutters have been found on manmade objects, most notably submarine parts.  

Additionally, an odd feature to these sharks is their fleshy lips and jaw structure.  The lower jaws contain the large more active teeth with the upper jaw housing the smaller digesting teeth.  Incidentally most sharks have the rows of replaceable teeth that fall out after attacking prey.  The cookie cutter's teeth actually fall in, and the shark digests its own teeth for calcium. 

So listen...not everything can be pretty, and not everything can be cuddly like a walrus...but really, ocean?  Really??  Ewww.

And now some bad news...

The high from George being granted a reprieve was short-lived.  Today we are faced with the news that Iceland is mulling over a decision to resume whaling.  Yup.  You read that right.  After nearly two decades of respecting the incredible ocean dwelling mammals the local government is all for starting up the slaughter machine.

What would be the purpose of such a barbaric practice?  Well, you could always ask Japan which uses the IWC as a shield in its aggressive whaling expeditions.  An antiquated law stating you can hunt whales for scientific purposes is a weak reason for killing.  And almost all whales that are caught in Japan end up in the fish market.  So then...what is the scientific purpose behind whale fin soup?  Of course, diverting your attention to whale-killing is a good way to distract you from noticing Japan's egregious overfishing practices. 

What to do about it?  Get involved.  There is no shortage of organizations that are supremely passionate about ocean-dwelling inhabitants.  Sea Shepherd is but one of them.  A significant difference between organizations like Sea Shepherd and Greenpeace is the Sea is like the PETA of the oceans.  It works to directly confront and disable commercial fleets that hunt and cripple ocean populations.  We're not for violence, but we are for action.  

So we're going to start the new year by guilting.  Please consider an action to help the earth get the justice it deserves.  We're not asking for a pound of flesh, the fish have already done that for you, we're just asking for compassion.  Think of it this way, we get angry at aliens for abducting us and poking at us with rods...why are we ok with doing it to our own earth?

Finally, some good news!

Things are off to a good start this year! How, you ask?  In a previous post your friendly neighborhood lobster was discussed, and the fine folks at PETA and City Crab have decided that it was proof enough to let George, the crustacean on your right, to go free.

Actually, the post had absolutely no bearing, but City Crab made the wonderful gesture to release George into the old lobster home.  Specifically Kennebunkport, ME where he shall live out the rest of his days doing...nothing.  The town in which he's headed to today has outlawed lobster fishing, so he's more or less guaranteed peace.

George has been estimated to be 140 years old and weighs in at over 20 pounds.  He would've faced imminent doom for $100 (plus 8.75% tax).  This blog thanks the crazy people at PETA as well as profusely thanking the folks at City Crab for doing the right thing.  Now of course if they could just do the right thing for all the lobsters there... 

p.s. - just how big is George?  Check out this photo of a fisherman releasing him into the wild:

Once again, the administrator is sorry.  Why we can't up this blog is beyond us, because we've had nothing to do the past two months.  

We promise a fun and festive entry in the coming days.  It is the New Year afterall, and hope springs eternal for the conservation and prosperity of all things ocean-dwelling.